Saturday, December 5, 2009

I am putting myself into this work 100%.

Okay, so I don't have much time But I figured I'd give you the "GOODS BADS FUNNIES SPIRITUAL and Other Things" of the week:

Um well lets get the bad stuff out of the way.... First off my favorite elders leave this week :( I love them so much-they make me laugh everyday and the have taught me so much. THEY ARE ALL SPANISH. I swear I love dark guys. They have a LOVE about them. Anyways, I had a really hard day this week. First off it started off good-I was learning alot and spanish was realllly starting to click and then I had class. (One of my teachers cares about us so much and has a love for us-but sometimes she doesn't know how to show it and she is extremely rude) And i'm talking like reallly rude. She knows how to make people feel really stupid. She spoke spanish her whole life (her mom is spanish) so I think she forgets that we are JUST LEARNING and don't know all she knows. She just will say things that make us feel so dumb. Well, I hadnt said anything about it...but it was starting to affect people. THen we had a combined class on Friday and so there were tons of people in our room (and one thing she told me to do in my interview with her a little while ago was to ASK QUESTIONS))) so we were learning about imperfect tense and I didn't get something she said because SHE ONLY speaks in spanish..so I asked her the question in spanish and she responded in the rudest way, making the meanest face and just was so mean about it FOR NO REASON. I just looked down and said, "Okay you don't have to be rude to me." And I forgot about the question. Only like 1 person heard me say that-but I know she felt dumb-so i talked to her after class. I CRIED. I cried because I felt so passionate about learning and was having the best day and she just tore me down. I guess this is a preview of what will happen in the "feild" with REAL people. Its just normally, I never get offended but when I talked to her-I was speaking for the class. After I talked to her, she apolojized to the class and cried to us and I know she will work on it. I also apolojized for saying my comment of her being rude. It's just she is only a year and a half older than me and she sure knows how to make u feel like your 5. But it's all good now...I love and care for her and I know she loves us. But that really kinda made the day bad. So that is the hard thing I had this week. .... BUT THINGS ARE BETTER. Well they are now. This morning I had this REALLY anxious feeling of "How am I going to do this?". I am trying sooo hard to teach in spanish and it is sooo difficult. Imagine getting up in front of a ward in Mexico and trying to teach them. Thats what we have to do everyday ....is teach in front of people...and I kinda go blank. So this morning was tough. BUT TODAY is p-day...so I was really excited to go to the temple. I NEEDED that peaceful feeling. So I went and it was nice. THEN i prayed. I prayed and asked heavenly father to give me guidance and So I opened my scriptures in the temple waiting room to D&C 6. It is where Christ is talking to Oliver Cowdery. I put myself in Oliver's shoes and THIS CHAPTER WAS FOR ME!!! It was amazing! PLEASE READ IT!! Towards the end my favorite scripture in it said to doubt not, fear not. And so thats how I am going to start to be. I am putting myself into this work 100%. I am praying as if everything depends on the Lord but working as if everything depends on me. SO LETTERS....will be slim for the next little bit. I've asked my district leader to not give me my mail until a certain day-so I can focus more. I got 12 letters yesterday. SOunds like a good thing?!! Well it actually stressed me out...Because I am trying sooo hard to focus but Satan will do anything to distract me. So right now I am focused on keeeping in contact with my family and very slim letters for everyone else.

Please read d&c 6
Honestly that was the first time I have opened my scriptures and recieved revelation for myself.

love hermana conley!!

3 comments:

  1. Dear Sweet Paige
    I read your letters for the first time and it reminded me of my days in the MTC. The spirit will bless you as you learn the language of the Lamanites. They are of humble birth. You will meet many that will love you and take you in their arms. You will learn to love the people and they will love you. Hold on to the Iron Rod. It will guide you throughout your mission. Listen for the promptings of the Holy Ghost it will guide you to those who are waiting specifically for you. God will bless you as you serve. You are in our prayers daily.
    Love and hugs.
    Tammy

    ReplyDelete
  2. i love reading paige's emails. seriously. even spencer enjoyed them :)

    ReplyDelete